Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Cranky Pants

That’s been me the last few days. I’m not sure why that is. It could be a number of things. I’m stressed about taking Callie to Texas to start her first year of school away from home. The school informed us about two weeks ago that they had over booked the dorm rooms and would be putting a third girl in a room designed for two. Stresser! She’s not happy, and I’m not happy. Hopefully it’s temporary and she can settle into her room without being moved, which is a possibility at this point.
I’m a little stressed having the teenage boy with us when he’s never lived with us before. I knew this would be a transition and it is. I need to remember that as hard as it is for me, it must be harder for him. I’m the adult. I am supposed to know how to handle these things. He’s had a huge change in his life, definitely for the better, but a change nonetheless. He’s not a boy that expresses himself at all. This surprises me. I knew him as a child when he wore his heart on his sleeve and every emotion came bubbling up like a volcano. What happened to him to make him repress his feelings? He shows no emotion. I don’t know how to deal with that. His habits are not one of a boy that has lived with us and it irritates me. It’s a work in progress and I need patience.
My house is still not quite right. The washing machine that was damaged in the move is hard to use. My dryer went completely out yesterday. It’s been acting up for days and then finally died yesterday. Not great timing since I was leaving today and as I was leaving, we had old friends coming to stay with Nick and Alex for a couple of nights. No laundry, I need to pack and clean my house and oh my gosh, I don’t have enough groceries or beer and wine for company!!!
I walked away from it all. In my cranky state, I left knowing Nick would struggle with the washing machine and that he would have to find a repairman or new dryer without me. I relished the thought. It’s ugly and I’m not generally an ugly person.
As I sit in the airport in Detroit, awaiting our flight to Texas, (which is delayed AGAIN) I know in my heart what’s wrong with me. I’m sending my baby girl off away from home. I’m going to miss her terribly. She’s nervous, scared and unsure of herself and that makes me jittery as well. Hopefully we’ll both feel better after getting her into her dorm room and meeting some fantastic roommates. Even if there are two instead of one. Even if they are crammed into a small room.
Say a prayer for all of us; I could use one right about now.
On the bright side, I will see all three of these people while I'm here. (of course I brought one of them with me)  I won't see them all together, but anytime I can see my kids it's a plus!


Jessica said...

It is really hard to deal with somebody that shows no emotion. Believe me, I know because I'm married to somebody just like that. My sweet husband was the same way when he was younger, and relationships as he got older made him decide not to show emotion. It's hard, but I know he loves me and he knows that I love him. I have to show him a little more affection or whatever, but it gets through the tough exterior. We've definitely had our ups and downs, but it is all worth it in the end.

I will send up a prayer for you and your daughter.

Mindee@ourfrontdoor said...

I'd be cranky in your shoes too. Change is hard and you've had a boatload.

"I relish the thought." LOL! I do that too. Evil, but satisfying!

Michelle said...

I really think you have earned the right to a few cranky days. You have been on the go nonstop since you left Hawaii. Repressed & emotionless I can relate to. My oldest is finely starting to show signs of life again. *omg* Paula, we finally went school shopping and she wasn't even interested in buying all black. There was no fight. She was even smiling. On Monday she was joking with her dad on the car ride home from school after he made sure she got the schedule she wanted. I wish I could blog about some of her changes but she reads my blog. I think we still have a long road ahead of us, especially when he deploys again. Just keep on him, he will come around. There are days I have to repeat "i love you" four or five times before she gives in and says it back.

JG said...

Wow, that's a lot going on all at once. Always seems like it never rains, but it pours.

I've been a crankypants, too, the last couple of weeks. I'm sure Texas will be very emotional with you, but it will also give you a lot to be happy about.

Anonymous said...

You raised her well and she is ready for the challenge. So is Mom. He will be able to figure out all the at home stuff. If they can survive a war zone, they can buy a new dryer...right?!?
Hope the rest of your trip goes smoothly.
lynn s/w

The OutPost said...

My only question would be "are you getting a partial refund on the dorm room"